fagsex:

have you ever done things at like specific times of the year so when it rolls back out youre like damn… smells like undertale outside

trash-inu:

you accidently entered the lab…

boss music starts playing

nervousmonolith:

“kill them with kindness” Wrong. Poseidon’s curse 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🐳🌊🐳🐳🌊🐳🌊🐳🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

kyoshi:

why

e-102:

headspace-hotel:

Today I accidentally knocked a monarch caterpillar off its leaf and it fell and immediately began oozing green liquid. I was devastated. I thought I’d killed it. Turns out they do that on purpose to defend against predators. Fooled by a fat little worm. Irrecoverable

sailorbrazil:

Oh thank god my roommate is finally asleep…. *unlocks secret passageway to my evil chambers*

analogseeker:

sinisterscientist:

hey dude great pokemon battle. i couldn’t help but notice your pokemon was wearing an extremely swag necklace, it reminded me of how lame and swagless me and my pokemon are. I’m gonna give you double the prize money as thanks for the opportunity of getting my ass kicked by an epically swag beast such as yours.

charlottan:

hey man youve been taking a while putting your change back in your wallet and i just wanted to let you know we are kicking you out of the grocwery sytore forever. goodbye

carrotsnake:

link: no one knows who i am or what i did for hyrule. i feel so invisible.

yiga clan: hey. don’t cry. 100 haters hunting you for sport ok?

jezifster:

Violence set to happy music will never get old to me. Blood splattering to an 80s pop song is like a sister to me because I’m not allergic to fun.

oldbaton:

You get an email from “Bear”. Just Bear. The subject line is “Just Imagine”. You open it and it is a picture of a salmon and nothing else

brain–rott:

“everybody experiences that” says mother who has the same symptom of the same mental illness

slow-burn-sally:

miishae:

Has anyone else noticed that as a society, we’re shamed for wanting to sleep? Sleeping in is bad, naps are only okay if they’re 20 minutes, you cant be tired unless you’re a <insert career/lifestyle choice here>, so on and so forth.

I mean, I think we all need to spread our blankets out, cuddle a pillow, and go to sleep. Everyone needs more of it, fuck this “it’s not productive” nonsense. It’s okay to sleep, it’s okay to want to sleep. You’re not lazy because of it.

Can we also stop with the one-upping about sleep. If someone tells you they’re tired because they only got six hours of sleep, please don’t immediately say “Oh that’s nothing! I only sleep three hours a night!”. Or “you don’t even know what tiredness is until you’ve done xyz thing!”

Just stop. We should all feel totally comfortable getting the amount of sleep we need. Be it four hours or 11.